Þæs ofereode, þisses swa mæg (000_hester_000) wrote,
Þæs ofereode, þisses swa mæg

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I feel both mildly annoyed and uncomfortable... questioning my sexuality again. I'm kind of undecided... and have been for quite awhile... and that's very annoying.
First, in, like, grade school, I was one of those reeeeaaalllly obnoxious boy-obsessed girls that chased all the boys around during recess in an exceptionally irritating manner.
Then, I was totally convinced that I was just asexual or something. But looking back, I think it's just because I hit puberty pretty late and my best friend at the time had started having sex when she was 12, so I was really only comparing myself to her.
Then, I decided that I was bi.
Then, I decided that I was straight.
...And now I'm not entirely sure where I stand. In terms of actual attraction, I prefer guys. But I would rather date a woman than a man. Men are so... mannish. I don't particularly like mannishness, I think it's annoying. And I realized that for a while now, I've really wished that I were just attracted to women... because lesbians are the cool. No, I don't know why. They just are.

Oh oh, plus when I was, like, 11, I had this dream about finding out that I was a lesbian. And that was when I was at my Christian Right phase at the time, so I was like 'Oh noez, not teh gheyz!!!!'

Today I did some ( very minimal ) research on teh interwebz and came up with the term bi-curious, which apparently describes me. But what does that mean, anyway? I mean, who's ever heard of being bi-curious?

I don't know....

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