Þæs ofereode, þisses swa mæg (000_hester_000) wrote,
Þæs ofereode, þisses swa mæg

It's almost like found object art

It turns out that the big blue thing's name was Kisame Hoshigaki. Yeah, i know, weird name. My name is so much cooler. I'm Yumi Kuro. I have blue almost black hair and sparkly red eyes. Yes, I said sparkly. Kisamewas blue COMPLETE WITH GILLS, A SWORD, AND A CLOAK. Yes, a cloak. I know right? Cloaks are so last winter. He even had a sidekick! "Robin's" name was Itachi Uchiha. Ooh, scary! I'm shaking in my sandals! Ha. He had black hair in a ponytail (that's for girls little boy), red Sharinganeyes, and THE SAME CLOAK. They were like the kind of people who were best friends and they dressed EXACTLY ALIKE! Yeah, it pissed me off too. I knew that I was too hot to resist, so these guys decided to kidnap me. I didn't have anything better to do so I went with them. It's not necassarilykidnapping when you willingly go. God, they were idgits.

Kisame's voice rang out feebly. "I love you too. For all eternity."

I heard the sounds of the Akatsuki coming for us. "Now! Climb on my back!"

Kisame stared at me weirdly, and I pointed to myself. "Vampire."

He nodded and hopped on my back. Then, we sped off into the night.

Is dat sum Twilight I see thar?

“Oh,” she mumbled, “I get it.” Kakashi’s visible eye widened. “Really?” She nodded. “You fucked my brother. I love man sex. It turns me on. It makes me wet,” she whispered her muscles tightening in a very sensitive spot.

Given that her brother is Obito, that's like... necro shouta incest by proxy?

Oh my God, my head hurt. “Who is she?” a soft, sexy, familiar voice said. “I don’t know Itachi. I found her in the woods. She’s got weird clothes,” another familiar voice said. OMG SHARK BOY AND LAVA GIRL! (Aka Kisame and Itachi) I had brown hair and purple eyes.


“I’m from a different dimension,” I said. Itachi nodded. Then, his lips crashed on mine. My first response was shock, and then I responded to the kiss. I fisted my hands in his hair and I pulled him closer.

She... she fisted Itachi? I'm not sure how to feel about that....

“So, can we have a wedding?” Leader stared at us. His real name was Pain. He had flaming red hair and piercings all over his body. ^_- “Sure. Why the fuck not?”

Kakashi: I feel so violated…. T.T

Jiraiya: I’m sorry…

Kakashi: you should be. I’m only 26 and I still got raped.

Jiraiya: Technically…it wasn’t rape you were laughing the whole time

Tags: akatsuki frat house, naruto, saint itachi, snark
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